The Daily Review
4/08/04 Vikings
The Daily Review

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For some reason Pirates are the hot ticket nowadays.  Well, I know why, because they're awesome, but if everyone thinks they're cool then they're not so cool.  Or that's the way I see it, things just get played out.  So until the fad of Pirates is over I will be fully endorsing Vikings.  See, Vikings are similar to Pirates but with an added flair of knighthood.  Vikings didn't pirate boats, well they may have, but they also stole peoples land, and that's cool in my book.  Pirates are comitted to the sea, I don't even think they could stand on land.  But Vikings had the ways of the sea and the land.  Vikings were supposedly good farmers, which is boring, but none the least they had more trades than any Pirate.  Vikings made their own boats and they were pretty groovy, but the coolest aspect to Vikings are there helmets.  They had friggin' horns attached to their helmets, that's true savage if I don't say.  Pirates can't beat up someone with their bandanas, but Vikings can destroy you with their helmets.  So here's a summary of how Vikings are better than Pirates.  One, Vikings takeover everything, Pirates take over ships.  Two, Vikings can kill you with their hats, Pirates cannot.  Three, Vikings have more than one talent, Pirates only know how to takeover ships and get drunk, plus obtain booty.  This list can go on forever.  One thing that makes Pirates better are their yells and clothes.  Eyepatches and peglegs will always have the superior accessories.

4/9/04