The Daily Review
2/22/06 Motorcycle Momma's
The Daily Review

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Have you noticed that all Motorcycle Momma's look pretty much the same?  Well, they do.  They all have long blonde hair, pretty skinny (if not from Maine), and their faces look like skulls.  I don't really undertsand this, but they look like their faces are slowly caving in.  Their cheek bones are either missing or melting.  I don't really know because I haven't gotten behind a knife in a while and I am also scared of Motorcycle Momma's.  I think the reason why their face is so weird is because of the "no action windshield", too much wind to the dome.  As for their attire, they typically have stoned washed jeans, or the lightest blue denim on the market.  On top of those spiffy jeans is a mass amount of leather.  Leather chaps, leather vest, leather boots, and sometimes if you're lucky- a leather bandana.  Those bandanas are so sweet.  I wish I had one, I mean, I wish I knew someone who wore one.  Back to the long hair.  I don't know why they have such long hair, but I think it has something to do with the fact that it looks like they're going so much faster because there is so much hair flapping in the wind.  I know if I had a motorcycle my hair would be hella long.  Also, for the record, I wouldn't be a motorcycle momma, I would be a "MOTORCYCLE MAD MAN"!  My hair would be so long that my lady would be eating that shit for a week after our sweet ride around.  Actually, if I had a motorcycle, it would be my only mode of transportation.  So if she wanted to go to the grocery store we'd have to bring the saddle bags to put our chips and beer in.  Unless she wanted to wear a back pack.  And the only back pack we would have would be a great big ol' hiking bag.  The one's with the poles in it for stability.  And I know she wouldn't want to wear that.

2/22/06